Hello there! My name is Laurie Arrowsmith and I am a Family Transformation Coach. I support parents with children who are trickier to parent via personal coaching and parenting programs. I help families across the globe to understand and work WITH their spirited kids, via phone or Skype.
Raising a spirited kid is not for the faint-hearted! As parents, we need a lot of strength and patience, which can be tough, even on the good days. On my parenting journey I’ve implemented many strategies from well-known parenting courses and authors. While some of the strategies worked some of the time, I mostly found that deep down they just didn’t feel right for my child and I would end up frustrated, feeling like a failure as a mother.
Then, when my eldest daughter was almost 3 years old, I discovered Thomas Gordon’s Parent Effectiveness Training (P.E.T.). At first it felt too good to be true – no punishment, no rewards, enhanced relationships etc. – but somehow it just felt ‘right’ for my child and who I wanted to be as a mother. So I dragged along my also desperate-for-help hubby and we did the program here in Melbourne, Australia together.
Now I would love to say that overnight things improved, but the truth is, it took a bit of work. There are many strategies to learn in this programme and we (especially me) were already worn out from the past experiences of raising our spirited child, not to mention the fact that we had a baby to care for too. So although I was super keen to put my new skills into practice, I didn’t have the emotional capacity to do so and would easily revert to my old way of doing things.
It was then I realised I needed to do some clearing work of my own before I could implement these skills successfully. This was the ‘Aha!’ moment for me that changed everything! This personal transformation is what led me to create the Stressed-to-Blessed coaching package and become an Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) Practitioner. The techniques used help parents who are struggling day-to-day and finding it hard to keep their emotions in check. Once cleared of your emotional baggage, it becomes so much easier to apply new parenting skills at home.
More about me….(if you’re still interested!)
I am a certified life coach, accredited Parent Effectiveness Training (P.E.T.) Instructor, and an Emotional Freedom Technique (E.F.T.) Practitioner. I am an avid reader of parenting and self-help books, and combine my qualifications and knowledge to coaching parents of spirited kids. I am passionate about helping parents who have spirited children so that they can have a fantastic relationship with their child, whilst keeping themselves sane. Believe me when I say ‘I understand spirited kids’!
I help parents to manage strong emotions, reduce stress and face their fears, so they are free to be the parent they want to be. I also offer courses in how to parent spirited children effectively by working WITH their spirit, not against it.
Spirited kids tend to attract many labels – strong-willed, difficult, stubborn, challenging, defiant, oppositional….and the list goes on. However, it is these types of labels that drove my desire to create Raising Spirited Kids, so that I can gently shift the mindset of parents to a more positive one; a mindset where parents can begin to view their spirited child in a far better way, to see ‘spirited’ as being an asset and a trait to work with rather than against.
Unfortunately, most parenting books I came across, in my now very extensive collection, tried to change the spirited kid and somehow break their spirit. This is not only terribly unfair, but stops children from blossoming into their absolute potential. Many of the traits spirited kids have are actually what we value in adulthood! It may sound tough, but I am here to help parents EMBRACE that spirit!
However, I want to point out that even with all my experience I don’t claim to be the perfect parent, far from it in fact! Being a mother of a spirited child myself, I know that as parents we are a constant work-in-progress. We are always learning, refining and bettering ourselves. I believe the opportunity to do this is even greater if you’re the parent of a spirited kid.
I can’t say our journey has been a smooth ride (you wouldn’t believe me anyway!). Challenges still arise, but I now feel confident as a parent of a spirited kid and just love the strong bond we have created.
I also know it will not always be any easy road, but with the self-care and parenting strategies that I have implemented, the ride will be so much smoother. I am especially grateful that it is this journey that has led me to be more in tune with who I am and who I want to be, both as a mother and as an individual.
On a more personal level, I am a wife, and mother to two amazing daughters, who keep me on my toes and make me practice what I preach! Originally from New Zealand, I now call Melbourne, Australia my home. I enjoy yoga, walking, eating well, reading parenting and self-help books and spending quality time with the people I love.